June 16, Ordinary 11B (2 Corinthians 5:6–10, (11–13), 14–17)

At the end of a silent prayer retreat at a Benedictine monastery, a Catholic deacon approached me over lunch and asked, “Young man, are you discerning a call to the priesthood?” I was a little flummoxed and said, “Why do you ask me that?” He responded, “I don’t know. You just have that look about you.” I had not noticed that look, but I told him I was already a Mennonite pastor. He said, “Oh, bless you, Father!”

It’s sometimes a strange thing to be a pastor. Once upon a time, my spiritual ancestors were part of a 16th-century lay renewal movement. Early communities appointed pastors, but at least at first they were just regular folks drawn from the congregation, sometimes chosen by lot. Today, most of the Mennonite pastors I know wear ordination lightly, admitting in our weaker moments that we’re not entirely confident how it’s supposed to work. You only catch us slapping “the Rev.” in front of our names when we’re writing a letter to our congressional representative—or feeling a little insecure. I suspect this rings true for others too, not just Anabaptists.

And yet, there’s something there, some devotion, some compulsion, maybe even a vocation. After a few days of silent prayer, we just have that look about us. It’s the elusive quality that the apostle Paul is talking about when he writes to the Corinthians, “The love of Christ urges us on.” Christ’s love for us and for others drives our leadership in the church.