Beth Merrill Neel
Handing over what is not mine
I was up worrying the other night. It happens. Worry is a spiritual gift I received from my mother, and I have worked hard to perfect that which was passed on to me. I also work not to pass it on to my daughter, but I worry that I am failing in that.
Anyway, I was worrying the other night when what I really wanted to be doing was falling asleep.
Grounded
It’s rare that my chiropractor and my spiritual director offer me the same advice, but when they do, I think it’s a sign that I’m supposed to pay particular attention.
The wound in his shoulder
I have been thinking about the wounds people carry, those unbearable weights that take their toll on our bodies and hearts.
Preaching resurrection in the middle of Lent
I am a big fan of the liturgical calendar.
As someone who plans worship, knowing what season it is helps. It helps us with the colors, the themes, the hymns, the scripture, the tone of worship. That being said, I must also admit that the liturgical season is an entirely human construct. We invented it to help us know God. God did not invent it to help God know us.
Flexibility and strength, at the gym and church
Evidently being able to bend over and touch the palms to the floor isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. And here I thought I had received high marks for my excellent flexibility. Why did I not learn this until I was 50? To make a long story short, here is my learning: flexibility is great, as long as it is matched by strength. The opposite is true, too—strength is great as long as it is matched by flexibility. So my chiropractor tells me I’m not allowed to stretch anymore, not until I’ve built up some strength.
I think this might be true for church, too.
The kindness place
A few weeks ago a child at church came into worship near tears. Her feelings had been hurt because she perceived that a couple of other kids had purposely excluded her from something. Normally I would probably not have been aware of any of this, but the sad child was my own. She sat down in the front pew and curled herself up into a little ball. It was one of those moments when I decided to be mom and not pastor. I sat with her and cuddled her and tried very hard not to give the other children the stink-eye. By the time the first hymn started she was okay and life went on.
Kids will be kids and I know that when two kids are gathered, fun ensues, and when three kids are gathered, one of them usually ends up feeling left out.
Busy, or full?
When someone inquires how I am, I often reply, “Good. Life is full.” I say that intentionally because I have grown weary of the excuse of being too busy. There’s an implication that in my busyness I have shut out people I love.
Help me, Baby Jesus—you’re my only hope!
A few recent conversations have gotten me to thinking about the large Load of Expectations people carry around with them this season. It’s a bit crazy making, really.
...Putting the vent back in Advent
Advent is upon us, and I’m just not feeling it this year. Granted, it is only the first week, but I’m not sure I can muster up all the mystery and purple and candles again this year.
On Sunday I heard myself say in my sermon something about making our hearts ready to receive the Christ Child this season. I said it as I have said it every Advent for the last 21 years. And later while I was doing the dishes I realized that I haven’t the foggiest idea what I mean by that.
A time to keep and a time to throw away
I have moved a lot, and by move, I mean pack up all of my belongings and take them out of one dwelling and unpack them in another dwelling....
10 tips for couples considering co-pastoring (and 10 for those hiring them)
My husband and I serve as co-pastors and heads of staff at Westminster Presbyterian Church in Portland, Oregon, each at two-thirds time. We are often asked about being married co-pastors by people considering this model. And we have more than a few reflections about it.
...Some things take a long time to heal
We were talking about health and mental health the other day in staff meeting, and I asked why mental health issues couldn’t just be called health issues....
Always the minister, never the bride
That was going to be the opening line of my stand-up routine, but I got married and never actually tried doing stand-up comedy, so now this great line is reduced to a blog post title.
There is an "I" in worship
A few Sundays ago, as the deacons brought the offering up to the table and the congregation sang the Old 100th doxology, I found myself doing what I always do when singing that doxology: changing t...